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Cadmium

from Shadowproof by Abbie Morin

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lyrics

We had a home
go down in smoke
within these bones,
and now I’m chaining up
so no one knows
about the rubble pile
inside me.

A troubled stand,
I try to float
but heavy growing pains
shackle me beneath my clothes
and pull the tighter ropes
around me.

I smile but all the while
I am starving for your moonlight-
cadmium yellow.
I search so hard in another’s arms,
they pale in the night.

Love you’ve let me fall astray.
You’ve been seeing an old friend.
It was Friday I was by myself-
I met somebody in the Old North End.

Will we give it away?
Will we give it away?
Or will we give it a way to breathe?

Quiet voice on the phone,
I start to choke
on the cracks
and all the ways they’ve grown.
Shadow canyons cut the light.

I pour it out
on a page
never sent,
and now it’s keeping me awake in bed-
lonely, burning sage in hindsight.

credits

from Shadowproof, released January 7, 2015

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Abbie Morin Northampton, Massachusetts

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